I love my campus- the old brick buildings with their quirks and history, the woods across the street open for exploration, the twisted trees full of character. As I walked around a few days ago, drinking in the cold night air, I discovered a new place. I’ve often looked at the rusted fire escape and lamented that its foot is situated within a tall fence. But that night, the gate had been left open. I ascended the steps and sat with my back against the wall. Above, brilliant stars were hung in a cloudless sky, below, white lights were strung on trees and bushes, illuminating campus with the wonder of the forthcoming Advent season. With the breeze just cool enough to keep me alert, I sat on the landing and wondered, imagined, dreamed, prayed. When I walked by later that evening, I could see my thoughts lingering over the area like a silver cloud. Places are full of meaning.
So many places- the spot in the ivy that retained the indentation of my countless visits even after a whole summer away, the stretch of the drive to my friend’s house that brings to mind many words spoken under this tunnel of trees, the soothingly lonely rooftop high above the quiet town, the brown chair weighted with months of revelation and contemplation. I am a part of each, and they are a part of me.
It is a mistake to disconnect ourselves from the space we occupy; we were created to move and dwell in three dimensions. I fully believe that everywhere I go, I leave a part of myself behind. And every time I stumble on a new place, I am entering into the story of all who have been there before. Each spot retains my thoughts and experiences like a fossilized footprint. Each time I revist a place, I rediscover these fossils until the visits are my prayers and the spaces themselves become my litany.
One night last spring I went for a much needed drive to clear my head. A few miles out of town, I turned down a bumpy back road and pulled off in a dark field. I stretched out under the stars until my thoughts and my tears reached a conclusion that propelled me into new growth. I’ve been back to this place, my Super Secret Stargazing Spot, a few times this fall. Each time I’m there I hear the earth and the grass whisper my own thoughts back to me as the stars remind me of my conclusions and the coyotes howl their agreement.
Places are full of meaning.
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